Jewish German
Synopsis: A comedy about a young woman who discovers her true heritage and heads to Jerusalem to find family members she never knew she had.
~*~CAST~*~
Catherine 'Cathy' Grebe:
Susan Grebe: (her mom)
Rebecca Grebe: (her grandmother)
Andrew Grebe: (her father)
Dorian Grebe: (her grandfather)
Debbie Grebestein: (cousin)
Angus Grebestein: (cousin/husband to Deb)
Morgan Grebestein: (cousin/daughter to Deb)
David Grebestien: (cousin/son to Deb) Ivanka Vladostov: (Cathy's bestie)
Boris Vladostov: (her dad)
Roxanna Vladostov: (her mom)
Snow Vladostov: (her grandmom)
Adam Cohen: (Guide, Historian)
Levi Cohen: (his dad)
Esther Cohen: (his mom)
Bubbe Frieda Cohen: (his grandmom)
Scene 1--Ancestry.Com
Susan: Cathy, what are you up to ? You've been on that blasted internet for hours now.
Cathy: Remember how I used to go on theorizing that we had Jewish heredity ?
Andrew: Yes. What did you find out ?
Cathy: Turns out, I was, in fact (self-assured, wry smirk) correct, dad. We are in-fact, Jewish Germans.
Susan: The biggest oxymoron I ever heard of.
Andrew: She's getting that determined, steely-eyed look again. Don't tell me.
Cathy: That I want to take a trip to Jersualem ? Alright, I won't.
Andrew: It's too dangerous.
Susan: Andy, if we don't go, we'll probably regret it.
Cathy: We're not going alone, the other Grebes are coming too.
Susan: It'll be an adventure.
Andrew: Getting ganged up on by my own wife and daughter. I thought I'd never see the day. (exhales a bit, a little deflated and defeated) I'll go along. More Grebes should mean more fortitude. Let's pray God has our back in this case.
Cathy: I'm sure we'll be fine. Ivanka will watch the house, don't worry about it. She's very responsible. I wouldn't ask her or her family if I didn't trust them.
(She calls up Ivanka)
Cathy: Just wait, you'll see. She'll agree.
Ivanka: Da ? You rang ?
Cathy: Vanka ! Would you look after the house this summer ? My family and I are booking a trip to Israel.
Ivanka: Sure, why not ?
Boris: We'll run a tight ship while you're away.
Cathy: Thanks Mr. Vladostov.
Boris: No problem !
Snow: Yeah !
Roxanna: Anything for family !
Cathy: (narrating) With that, we said our goodbyes to our neighbors, and I said my farewells to my best friend. I could barely contain my anticipation as we made our long, arduous flight to Tel Aviv airport.
(Jerusalem plays in the background and they land, but quickly go to bed. Dissolve. 'The Next Day' appears on screen.)
Scene 2--At First Sight
Susan: (looking at her itenerary) Today's the big day everyone. We're to meet our tour guide, Adam Cohen.
Rebecca: Let's get moving then, honey ! I'm way ahead of you.
Dorian: Not until we've had a proper breakfast, Becky. It's the
(Everyone chimes in)
Most important meal of the day.
Cathy: (narrating) After we filled our bellies, we met Mr. Cohen. I couldn't keep my eyes off him. He was intelligent, handsome, had a lilting voice and quirky humor. My heart was doing the samba and nothing I could do would stop it. I was struck by Cupid's arrow.
(She hears Lovesick playing in her brain whilst Adam hears American Woman playing in his)
Adam: (flirtatiously) As you probably already know I am your guide. Ask me anything. I've lived her my entire life, I know the area better than my back hand.
Cathy: (lightly bumping against him) Ah, I'm such a klutz. I'm so sorry.
Adam: Appology accepted, Ms...
Cathy: Ms. Grebe.
Adam: Grebe ? We have Grebesteins here. Maybe you are related to them ?
Diovan: That's what we're here to discover, my good man !
Rebecca: Adventure ! (cheers)
Cathy: My whole family. We're nuts but we mean well.
Adam: (nudging her) You think you're meshuggenah, you should meet MY family. We take the cake. Anyhow, I'll give you the grand tour and I can show you where the Grebestein's live. In fact, I could even arrange a meal for all of you.
Susan: You'd do that for us ?
Andrew: (is totally speechless) You really didn't have to.
Adam: I feel you have a lot of questions and you just want to answer them. I'm here to help as much as I can.
(As they get closer, Cathy swears she can hear an instrumental version of Make a Wish, Baby.)
Cathy: (narrating) Seeing the beauty of the city, the historical and sacredness of the country really moved me, but I was surprised that Adam wanted to take me to a club after the tour was over for the day. My family went off to learn more and gather with the Grebesteins, to which I told them I would catch up with the Grebesteins tomorrow. Now I just had to freshen up and look my best. Good thing Ivanka convinced me to pack my LBD with sequins !
(As she gets ready 'I Can't Wait' plays in the background and he meets her at the door, dressed incredibly well.)
Adam: (low whistle) You look positively radiant. You only become more beautiful every time I see you.
Cathy: You're just saying that.
Adam: (Takes her hand gently) No, I truly mean that. I've seen many women in my day, but none compare to you.
(They make it to the club and fast-paced Israeli dance music is playing. Cathy overcomes her shyness and begins dancing, especially with Adam who chortles and joins in. All of a sudden a slow song plays and he takes her hand and holds her around the waist.)
Adam: Might I ?
Cathy: (blushing darkly) Of course. You dance so well.
Adam: Coming from the one with such poise and grace. (he laughs sweetly) I hope I don't come across as too forward, but I just can't help myself.
Cathy: (still blushing) No, the feeling's quite mutual. (narrating)
From the moment we met, we knew we were in love with each other. Neither one of us knew how, but we realized that there had to be sacrifices made if we wanted to continue our blossoming relationship.
Of all the gifts coming out of this venture to the Holy Land, I recieved the most sacred gift of all; unconditional love.
(Scene fade, right of course, after the slow song and Cathy recieving her first, extremely romantic, seering kiss that leaves the new couple breathless. There's a bit of a table turner here genderwise as well. Adam places his head against Cathy's chest, holding her close for the rest of the waltz.)
Scene 3--Meeting the Grebestiens
Cathy: (singing Pharrel's Happy)
Susan: Someone's awfully sprightly today.
Andrew: The date went well, we take it ?
Cathy: (spinning around, stopping, posing dramatically) However did you guess ?
Rebecca: That glow says everything, honey child.
Cathy: Enough about me, tell me about the Grebestiens !
Dorian: Ask them yourself, doll. We've invited them to dinner.
Cathy: That's so sudden though. Weren't we going to the market today to search for handmade crafts ?
Susan: Yes, but we still have time for dinner. Don't worry. I'm sure you'll all get along. You are so easy-going anyways, no one has ever gotten angry at you.
Cathy: Not entirely true mom. Besides, you're just biased because I'm your daughter.
Susan: (tickling her from behind) Yes, it's true. That I am !
Cathy: Stop that ! (narrating) It wasn't like my parents to be so spontaneous but I was glad that they were being so free spirited for once.
David: Hey, cuz !
Morgan: Shalom ! (she laughs)
Cathy: Good to meet you. Fancy meeting you guys here.
Debbie: When we heard your mom was fixing casserole we ran right over.
Angus: It smells ambrosial. I brought a salad. Hope that's alright.
Susan: Certainly is, Gus. One thing we all hold in common is our innate ability to cook culinary delights.
Angus: (nodding) Mmm-hmm. Debbie here has us all spoiled. It's no wonder we don't all weigh 400 lbs.
(They all laugh)
Cathy: (narrating) Just like that it was like we had never been separated. Like myself, Morgan had decided to start searching the Interwebs for information and came upon our surname. Thus the historical event known as our family reunion became reality.
David: So, about this Adam fellow ? Should we start calling him cousin too ?
Cathy: (Spits her water to the side) Who told them ? You did, didn't you grandpa !
Grandpa: (innocent, acting oblivious) Nah, couldn't be.
Cathy: (narrating) Seems like everyone else in the room knew of my romance. Everything was going along marvelously but soon, alas, we had to leave. Adam wanted to come with me but realized he would be leaving everything he knew behind.
(Scene flash to the tarmack at the airport...)
Adam: (vowing, hugging her close) I'll do everything humanly possible to get a green card and come to you.
Cathy: What if, though, I fall in love with someone else while I'm waiting for you ?
Adam: If that happens, I will be happy, because the same will happen to me. I'm certain you would support me as well. Friendship never ends, even when love might.
Cathy: You're so wise. (teary eyed) I don't want to leave you. I adore you so much.
Adam: (kisses her eyelids and wipes her tears) Don't cry. You'll see me again, I guarantee it.
Cathy: (narrating) Like that, it was as if I had experienced a fleeting reverie; something lovely, soft, ethereal and ephemeral. I waited for what I felt was forever, never once finding another love even akin to Adam's. It was providence that brought him to me and kismet that we would be together. Now, another year passes and he has finally come to be my husband. Honestly, I never thought I would be getting a husband out of our trip to the Holy Land, but it was certainly worth it.
Ivanka: It's just like a faery tale.
Cathy: With all the twists and turns, bumps and obstacles as reality is wont to do with the curveballs it'll throw at you every so often.
Ivanka: How long has it been ?
Cathy: I waited 4 years for Adam and we've been married for 1 year. (pats her belly expectantly) Looks like we have a little one that'll join the Grebe's too.
Ivanka: Will I be able to be this child's godmom ?
Cathy: Sure. You took such wonderful care of my fishies whilst I was gone, though you are well aware, babies are far different from fishies !
Ivanka: Way more devious, way more smart. (she giggles)
Cathy: Come to think of it, I think the Grebestiens said they were coming for the baby shower. They're all thinking of coming here. Can you imagine that ?
Ivanka: Family's always getting larger, isn't it ?
Cathy: (narrating) And come to think of it, I wouldn't want it any other way. They had made everything so much more colorful and bright, and with baby AJ on the way, things would become even happier. My parents and grandparents were even more eager about AJ's arrival than I was, but suffice it to say, he became a beloved little angel, though fussy at times. Who wasn't cranky when they were hungry though ? I end my journal for the time being, but my story is far from done. Tomorrow is another day, and where I take it from there is up to me.
(We see the transition of time in the form of a montage. Adam, Cathy and the entire family are enjoying AJ's first birthday party, complete with festivities, balloons and a celebratory clown doing magic tricks. 'You Make Me Feel Alive Again' plays in the background. Adam and Cathy kiss sweetly as they wave their goodbyes, creating a heartfelt family portrait, and the scene goes to black. This wouldn't have been realized had I not checked into my background. I have only one thing to say about it. As far as life is concerned, I lift my glass and I toast to a long, fulfilling life, full of love, laughter, adventure and suprises at every turn. To everyone who supported me and loved me, I love you so much words cannot possibly convey my deepest gratitude. L'chaim, ya'll !)
~*~CAST~*~
Catherine 'Cathy' Grebe:
Susan Grebe: (her mom)
Rebecca Grebe: (her grandmother)
Andrew Grebe: (her father)
Dorian Grebe: (her grandfather)
Debbie Grebestein: (cousin)
Angus Grebestein: (cousin/husband to Deb)
Morgan Grebestein: (cousin/daughter to Deb)
David Grebestien: (cousin/son to Deb) Ivanka Vladostov: (Cathy's bestie)
Boris Vladostov: (her dad)
Roxanna Vladostov: (her mom)
Snow Vladostov: (her grandmom)
Adam Cohen: (Guide, Historian)
Levi Cohen: (his dad)
Esther Cohen: (his mom)
Bubbe Frieda Cohen: (his grandmom)
Scene 1--Ancestry.Com
Susan: Cathy, what are you up to ? You've been on that blasted internet for hours now.
Cathy: Remember how I used to go on theorizing that we had Jewish heredity ?
Andrew: Yes. What did you find out ?
Cathy: Turns out, I was, in fact (self-assured, wry smirk) correct, dad. We are in-fact, Jewish Germans.
Susan: The biggest oxymoron I ever heard of.
Andrew: She's getting that determined, steely-eyed look again. Don't tell me.
Cathy: That I want to take a trip to Jersualem ? Alright, I won't.
Andrew: It's too dangerous.
Susan: Andy, if we don't go, we'll probably regret it.
Cathy: We're not going alone, the other Grebes are coming too.
Susan: It'll be an adventure.
Andrew: Getting ganged up on by my own wife and daughter. I thought I'd never see the day. (exhales a bit, a little deflated and defeated) I'll go along. More Grebes should mean more fortitude. Let's pray God has our back in this case.
Cathy: I'm sure we'll be fine. Ivanka will watch the house, don't worry about it. She's very responsible. I wouldn't ask her or her family if I didn't trust them.
(She calls up Ivanka)
Cathy: Just wait, you'll see. She'll agree.
Ivanka: Da ? You rang ?
Cathy: Vanka ! Would you look after the house this summer ? My family and I are booking a trip to Israel.
Ivanka: Sure, why not ?
Boris: We'll run a tight ship while you're away.
Cathy: Thanks Mr. Vladostov.
Boris: No problem !
Snow: Yeah !
Roxanna: Anything for family !
Cathy: (narrating) With that, we said our goodbyes to our neighbors, and I said my farewells to my best friend. I could barely contain my anticipation as we made our long, arduous flight to Tel Aviv airport.
(Jerusalem plays in the background and they land, but quickly go to bed. Dissolve. 'The Next Day' appears on screen.)
Scene 2--At First Sight
Susan: (looking at her itenerary) Today's the big day everyone. We're to meet our tour guide, Adam Cohen.
Rebecca: Let's get moving then, honey ! I'm way ahead of you.
Dorian: Not until we've had a proper breakfast, Becky. It's the
(Everyone chimes in)
Most important meal of the day.
Cathy: (narrating) After we filled our bellies, we met Mr. Cohen. I couldn't keep my eyes off him. He was intelligent, handsome, had a lilting voice and quirky humor. My heart was doing the samba and nothing I could do would stop it. I was struck by Cupid's arrow.
(She hears Lovesick playing in her brain whilst Adam hears American Woman playing in his)
Adam: (flirtatiously) As you probably already know I am your guide. Ask me anything. I've lived her my entire life, I know the area better than my back hand.
Cathy: (lightly bumping against him) Ah, I'm such a klutz. I'm so sorry.
Adam: Appology accepted, Ms...
Cathy: Ms. Grebe.
Adam: Grebe ? We have Grebesteins here. Maybe you are related to them ?
Diovan: That's what we're here to discover, my good man !
Rebecca: Adventure ! (cheers)
Cathy: My whole family. We're nuts but we mean well.
Adam: (nudging her) You think you're meshuggenah, you should meet MY family. We take the cake. Anyhow, I'll give you the grand tour and I can show you where the Grebestein's live. In fact, I could even arrange a meal for all of you.
Susan: You'd do that for us ?
Andrew: (is totally speechless) You really didn't have to.
Adam: I feel you have a lot of questions and you just want to answer them. I'm here to help as much as I can.
(As they get closer, Cathy swears she can hear an instrumental version of Make a Wish, Baby.)
Cathy: (narrating) Seeing the beauty of the city, the historical and sacredness of the country really moved me, but I was surprised that Adam wanted to take me to a club after the tour was over for the day. My family went off to learn more and gather with the Grebesteins, to which I told them I would catch up with the Grebesteins tomorrow. Now I just had to freshen up and look my best. Good thing Ivanka convinced me to pack my LBD with sequins !
(As she gets ready 'I Can't Wait' plays in the background and he meets her at the door, dressed incredibly well.)
Adam: (low whistle) You look positively radiant. You only become more beautiful every time I see you.
Cathy: You're just saying that.
Adam: (Takes her hand gently) No, I truly mean that. I've seen many women in my day, but none compare to you.
(They make it to the club and fast-paced Israeli dance music is playing. Cathy overcomes her shyness and begins dancing, especially with Adam who chortles and joins in. All of a sudden a slow song plays and he takes her hand and holds her around the waist.)
Adam: Might I ?
Cathy: (blushing darkly) Of course. You dance so well.
Adam: Coming from the one with such poise and grace. (he laughs sweetly) I hope I don't come across as too forward, but I just can't help myself.
Cathy: (still blushing) No, the feeling's quite mutual. (narrating)
From the moment we met, we knew we were in love with each other. Neither one of us knew how, but we realized that there had to be sacrifices made if we wanted to continue our blossoming relationship.
Of all the gifts coming out of this venture to the Holy Land, I recieved the most sacred gift of all; unconditional love.
(Scene fade, right of course, after the slow song and Cathy recieving her first, extremely romantic, seering kiss that leaves the new couple breathless. There's a bit of a table turner here genderwise as well. Adam places his head against Cathy's chest, holding her close for the rest of the waltz.)
Scene 3--Meeting the Grebestiens
Cathy: (singing Pharrel's Happy)
Susan: Someone's awfully sprightly today.
Andrew: The date went well, we take it ?
Cathy: (spinning around, stopping, posing dramatically) However did you guess ?
Rebecca: That glow says everything, honey child.
Cathy: Enough about me, tell me about the Grebestiens !
Dorian: Ask them yourself, doll. We've invited them to dinner.
Cathy: That's so sudden though. Weren't we going to the market today to search for handmade crafts ?
Susan: Yes, but we still have time for dinner. Don't worry. I'm sure you'll all get along. You are so easy-going anyways, no one has ever gotten angry at you.
Cathy: Not entirely true mom. Besides, you're just biased because I'm your daughter.
Susan: (tickling her from behind) Yes, it's true. That I am !
Cathy: Stop that ! (narrating) It wasn't like my parents to be so spontaneous but I was glad that they were being so free spirited for once.
David: Hey, cuz !
Morgan: Shalom ! (she laughs)
Cathy: Good to meet you. Fancy meeting you guys here.
Debbie: When we heard your mom was fixing casserole we ran right over.
Angus: It smells ambrosial. I brought a salad. Hope that's alright.
Susan: Certainly is, Gus. One thing we all hold in common is our innate ability to cook culinary delights.
Angus: (nodding) Mmm-hmm. Debbie here has us all spoiled. It's no wonder we don't all weigh 400 lbs.
(They all laugh)
Cathy: (narrating) Just like that it was like we had never been separated. Like myself, Morgan had decided to start searching the Interwebs for information and came upon our surname. Thus the historical event known as our family reunion became reality.
David: So, about this Adam fellow ? Should we start calling him cousin too ?
Cathy: (Spits her water to the side) Who told them ? You did, didn't you grandpa !
Grandpa: (innocent, acting oblivious) Nah, couldn't be.
Cathy: (narrating) Seems like everyone else in the room knew of my romance. Everything was going along marvelously but soon, alas, we had to leave. Adam wanted to come with me but realized he would be leaving everything he knew behind.
(Scene flash to the tarmack at the airport...)
Adam: (vowing, hugging her close) I'll do everything humanly possible to get a green card and come to you.
Cathy: What if, though, I fall in love with someone else while I'm waiting for you ?
Adam: If that happens, I will be happy, because the same will happen to me. I'm certain you would support me as well. Friendship never ends, even when love might.
Cathy: You're so wise. (teary eyed) I don't want to leave you. I adore you so much.
Adam: (kisses her eyelids and wipes her tears) Don't cry. You'll see me again, I guarantee it.
Cathy: (narrating) Like that, it was as if I had experienced a fleeting reverie; something lovely, soft, ethereal and ephemeral. I waited for what I felt was forever, never once finding another love even akin to Adam's. It was providence that brought him to me and kismet that we would be together. Now, another year passes and he has finally come to be my husband. Honestly, I never thought I would be getting a husband out of our trip to the Holy Land, but it was certainly worth it.
Ivanka: It's just like a faery tale.
Cathy: With all the twists and turns, bumps and obstacles as reality is wont to do with the curveballs it'll throw at you every so often.
Ivanka: How long has it been ?
Cathy: I waited 4 years for Adam and we've been married for 1 year. (pats her belly expectantly) Looks like we have a little one that'll join the Grebe's too.
Ivanka: Will I be able to be this child's godmom ?
Cathy: Sure. You took such wonderful care of my fishies whilst I was gone, though you are well aware, babies are far different from fishies !
Ivanka: Way more devious, way more smart. (she giggles)
Cathy: Come to think of it, I think the Grebestiens said they were coming for the baby shower. They're all thinking of coming here. Can you imagine that ?
Ivanka: Family's always getting larger, isn't it ?
Cathy: (narrating) And come to think of it, I wouldn't want it any other way. They had made everything so much more colorful and bright, and with baby AJ on the way, things would become even happier. My parents and grandparents were even more eager about AJ's arrival than I was, but suffice it to say, he became a beloved little angel, though fussy at times. Who wasn't cranky when they were hungry though ? I end my journal for the time being, but my story is far from done. Tomorrow is another day, and where I take it from there is up to me.
(We see the transition of time in the form of a montage. Adam, Cathy and the entire family are enjoying AJ's first birthday party, complete with festivities, balloons and a celebratory clown doing magic tricks. 'You Make Me Feel Alive Again' plays in the background. Adam and Cathy kiss sweetly as they wave their goodbyes, creating a heartfelt family portrait, and the scene goes to black. This wouldn't have been realized had I not checked into my background. I have only one thing to say about it. As far as life is concerned, I lift my glass and I toast to a long, fulfilling life, full of love, laughter, adventure and suprises at every turn. To everyone who supported me and loved me, I love you so much words cannot possibly convey my deepest gratitude. L'chaim, ya'll !)
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