Don't Believe the Hype

I know, I know.   I'm an optimist.  I'm warm, fuzzy, full of rainbow thoughts and attributes.   Yes, this is my typical function on a normal day.    However, with the economy being what it is, allow me to interject some reality into the situation.    Finding a job, even in the New Year, is harder than frozen matoh balls.   It's not appetizing and it sure as heck takes time before they thaw to become as such.    I don't mean to rant, rave or vent, but I have been leaning super hard on Jesus and God.   Harder than I have ever leaned before.  I'm surprised I don't walk with a permanent hunch or kink !     I got a letter from Amazon (actually the DWD).  I was hopeful that it would file in my favor.  But no.   Oh, no.   Heavens to Betsy, we can't do that.   Yes, I understand I knew the policy.  I followed that little policy to the letter.  I didn't expect that I would be GRIEVING the death of my dad.   Mom and dad were my life, but especially my dad.   I am doing better now going to grief counseling but it makes me regret (ever so slightly) that I didn't find Grief Share when I did.   What's that adage ?  Oh, right.  'Everything happens for a reason'.   There is a time and purpose to all things under heaven.   I know Ecclesiastes well, it's a favorite of mine.  I don't like professing that I can quote most of the OT (especially Isaiah) mostly word for word but for the life of me I can't figure why I would be tested so harshly over something so human, raw and real.    I know Amazon is very strict over their attendance policy but they should at least set aside time for people to grieve.   Grieving isn't easy.   I know dad is with me and so is mom.  There are times though, I pick up something belonging to them and start to break down.   Sometimes I wonder if there was some sort of fundamental flaw in me that caused this to happen.  I haven't been fired from very many jobs.   I quit some due to the fact that I was miserable, but being fired from a job doesn't happen often to me.  I stick it out and I go for broke.  When I commit, I commit.    This has been the hardest thing I have ever done other than keep my friend Jason at a distance.  I admit the sex we had after I lost my job wasn't that great.  I felt like I was being halved by a cleaver or broken in two by a lumberjack.    So, my first two tries at sex were less than phenomenal.   I'll find the right person to mingle with someday.   For the time being, I have my fingers and toys to keep me occupied.  I prefer digital over mechanical though.    Old school all the way.   (laughs)    Anyway, back to my rant.  A lot of stuff went down in 2016 and 2017 seems to be better except for the economy.   I applied for 2 jobs.  One was for State Farm.  The other was Bender Lumber.   Math isn't my strong suit so I don't know how well I did on their mathematics portions of their application.   I did the best I could.  If I had a calculator I would've done better.  I gave it the ol' college try though.  

What I am doing currently...
1.  Tough Act to Follow
2.  Vatoland (I've been meaning to write something like this FOR YEARS, MANG)
3.   People of the Flock (this is one my bf and I will write together) 

Watching
1.  Romancing the Stone
Tons of other movies to come, stay tuned

Until next time, stay frosty everyone.